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How much do Celerons make baby kittens want to cry?

Last updated 2005.

Synopsis: Celerons (not the Celeron D) are very bad processors and should be avoided. There are many other less expensive better solutions.

I feel it's a little bit of a crime against the consumer to utterly and completely deceive them into thinking something false - and our unfortunate Chipzilla friend Intel does this pretty consistently. Basically take a look below - the Intel Celeron (not Celeron D) is an absurd POS excuse for a processor, and I decided I'd throw out some pretty revealing benchmarks to demonstrate that fact. So yeah, take a look and remember not to ever buy low-end Intel. EVER. I don't care how much that naked confounded Will Morton offers you. He lives in a trailer...in Alabama!

The following are excerpts from the benchmarks found here at Anandtech.com.

3D Studio Max Benchmark
3D Studio Max - a video rendering benchmark. Normally Intel's architecture is good at doing video editing/creating/rendering related tasks.  In this case it's the time it takes to render - so lower is better (less time to do something). Note the Pentium 4 that's a full 800 mhz slower still beats the living petunias out of both of the Celerons... and they all lose to AMD's budget chips of yesterday.

Aquamark 3 Benchmark
Aquamark 3, a synthetic gaming test that tends to make use of higher clock rate processors and chips with larger caches.  In this test higher is better - it means you're getting more frames per second. Again the old Pentium 4 wins over the Celeron many hundred mhz faster than it, and they all get mopped up by the Athlons.

Business Winstone 2004 Benchmark
A Business Winstone benchmark designed to test general usage performance of everyday applications that we all know and use.  Higher is better. The Intel chips get schooled yet again, and once again the old Pentium 4 moons the Celeron quality crap competition. Oh, for the record, an Athlon XP 1700+ is clocked at 1.47 ghz... almost half that of the craptacular Celeron 2.6 ghz.

Quake 3 Code Compile Time Benchmark
Just another example of Celeron failure. The Athlon wins over the bottom end Celeron by a pretty significant number, too. This benchmark is from compilation of Quake 3 Open GL code. No that's not a game - it's the computer changing one set of instructions into another set - compiling is a common and essential task in the world of computing.  Lower is better - it's the amount of time it takes to compile code, so less is good.

Moral of the story, the old Celeron generation is a complete and total joke. Friends don't let friends (or stupid parents) buy Celerons, okay?

I do need to note that the Celeron D (note obnoxious letter on the end) generation is based on a new architecture and eliminates the majority of the flaws present in the old Celerons. They still fall short of the Athlon XP's and Semprons, but generally only marginally. It's okay to let your comrades purchase those. I myself used one as a place holder in server at home.